Dad Jokes :D

[James Freeman]

 

[paisleywookiee]

My wife just got hired at a restaurant as a waitress. The owner was delighted with her, because she brought a lot to the table.

 

[Sleezy E]

How do you know it's a dad joke?

It becomes a parent

 

[mbenigni]

My kid's gonna love/hate these.

 

[the swede]

How do you know it's a dad joke?

It becomes a parent

Winner!

 

[Alex Kenivel]

Is this the dadabase for all dad jokes?

 

[Fireproof]

Why is an egg small white and round? Because if it were big gray and wrinkled, it’d be an elephant.

 

[the swede]

Dad jokes on IG

 

[James Freeman]

"Boss can I have a week off around Christmas?”
Boss: “It’s May.”
“Sorry. May I have a week off around Christmas?”

 

[Los-D]

This thread just made my kids’ day.

 

[Bob Zaod]

Jack and Jill went up the hill, each a buck and a quarter...oh wait wrong thread.

 

[mk5]

What do you call a man with a rubber toe?

Roberto.

 

[Fireproof]

What do you call a man with a rubber toe?

Roberto.

What did his parents name his twin brothers? Jose and Hose B.

 

[the swede]

I always hammer down on my kids when they ask “dad! Did you cut your hair”… they know it coming and they think I’m an idiot for pointing out that I didn’t actually cut my hair myself.

 

[Los-D]

What does Fractal Audio call their firmware release information?

“Cliff notes”

 

[the swede]

What does Fractal Audio call their firmware release information?

“Cliff notes”

That’s like beyond the intricate and delicate art of dad jokes.. this is masterclass of epic proportions. Dayum…

 

[KingsXJJ]

What did her parents do when the little girl played too hard and got tuckered out?

Tucked ’er in.



Thank you very much.

 

[jimmy Biter]

What does a robot take when it's sick?
Robo-tussin....

Did you hear about the mathematician with constipation?
He worked it out with a pencil....

 

[Fireproof]

I always hammer down on my kids when they ask “dad! Did you cut your hair”… they know it coming and they think I’m an idiot for pointing out that I didn’t actually cut my hair myself.

Haha. They ask me did you get a haircut? And I have to answer - “no I got them all cut…”

 

[the swede]

Haha. They ask me did you get a haircut? And I have to answer - “no I got them all cut…”

Ahhh. I see “a” hair. Haha.. so funny,

Had to think twice though… I’m Swedish :)