What was your worst workplace screw up?

[la szum]

Reminded of a Wedding Ooopss... after reading the ones here. While working music retail in my early to mid 20s
a guy who bought a lot of music asked me if I wanted to do some DJ gigs with him. He had a local radio personality
doing it, but that guy got a great gig in NYC working for a Radio Station. So he was in a pinch, and had a phobia
about being on a microphone----even as he owned the business, booked the Weddings, and bought all the music.
It was $100 to do the Chicken Dance, take requests, and introduce the Wedding Party. Standard DJ stuff for a Wedding.

We are all good. Playing music. Nothing to mention. We are all set up before the Bride and Groom walk in. Everything is
good.

We are alerted that the Wedding Party is arriving and we should introduce them as they enter the Reception. DJ owner
guy hands me a list of the entire Wedding Party. I am going to start with the Bridesmaids and Groomsmen, and then
end with the Bride and Groom being introduced last. Everything goes well until I introduce the Happy Couple as
"Mr. and Mrs...... X"

Place goes silent and everyone looks at me like I just murdered Grandma right there. I look at the guy next to me
in the DJ Booth and he just shrugs.

We keep getting bad looks from the crowd, but lots of people are dancing. Then it is time for the whole take the Garter
Belt thing off of the Bride's leg, and I introduce the new couple as "Mr. and Mrs.... X" again.

Holy fucking Deathstare Batman! The Groom looks like he wants to kill me. Literally!

We proceed. This is getting awkward.

Then I have to take a leak. I go take a piss, and while I am standing in the Urinal pissing the entire throng of Groomsmen,
including the Best Man, come in. "What are you some kind of smart-ass comedian. You must think this is pretty funny. We
came in here to kick your ass, but our friend doesn't want that to ruin his Wedding, so you better knock the crap off and
get your shit together, buddy."

I still have ZERO idea what I did. Long hair? Bad shirt? Ball sack hanging out? I fucked the Bride and don't remember that I
did? I am totally clueless.

I tell the guy who I am working for about my visit in the Men's Room when I get back to the DJ Booth. He has no idea and
is telling me," What did you you are not telling me about? Do you know these people?"

We go through more music and I get a request to bring out the Bride and Groom for a slow song, and introduce the couple
again so people can clank their Champagne glasses together. "Once more, let's give it up for Mr. and Mrs. .... X."

Yup. This is where I am going to die. It's gonna happen before we get out of here. I did something I can't remember.

That's when sweet ol' Grandma comes up and comes to the DJ Booth. She leans in and motions me to do the same to her.
She whispers in my ear, "Every time you have introduced the Bride and Groom tonight you have used the Bride's Maiden
name as their last name when you have done so."




Makes sense!

When the guy who owned the business wrote out the names of the Bridal Party he used the Bride's maiden last name,
because it was her Dad's last name on the check that paid for his DJ service.

In another time and place I would have been bludgeoned to death, and not known why.

 

[mbenigni]

Heh, I've run a couple of SQL update queries without Where clauses luckily able to fix it quickly with nobody else knowing

Of course none of this means anything to you if you don't know some database stuff

I'm super paranoid about this. I'll always start typing an UPDATE statement as a comment (--), and will actually type the WHERE clause before going to the previous line and typing the SET terms. (Or I'll write the whole thing as a SELECT first, so I can see the result set, before changing it to an UPDATE.)

I do remember one time when a guy called me to his desk in the middle of a really fast paced day, and asked me to debug a lengthy query on his screen. I found the bug, made a quick change, then (pure muscle memory) wacked Ctrl-E to execute the query. I didn't realize that he had a half dozen unrelated queries open in the same window. (Anti-climactic ending: no harm done. But that could have been very bad.)

 

[DrewJD82]

Im an underwriter so I say yes to a lot of loans that go south. But I'm still employed so I guess I haven't made too big of a blunder yet.


I remember cooking on the line in college. The boss was ocd about bagging everything. I went to drop a chicken breast into the flyer and it went in with the bag on a accident bc we were slammed and my gloves were slippery. Didn't serve it but the oil was probably a little f****d.

Hahahaha that used to happen all the time at Chili’s; everything is portioned and put into prep bags, at least twice a night someone would go to throw some wings or something in there and the whole bag would go in. Can’t do anything about it mid-shift and that oil only gets changed once it’s been black for a couple weeks under normal conditions.

We used to throw bags of ice cubes in there when the fry guy wasn’t looking (I was the fry guy for like 3 years) and just stand back to watch the fun. Surprisingly, those grease burns go away after a couple years. My arms used to look like I was in a chemical spill (didn’t help that my shitty behavior back then would often have me slamming food into the fryer like an angry child) but after about 2 years the scars went away, or they’re covered by tats and I can’t see them anymore.

 

[mbenigni]

This is why I won't work in SSMS without SQL Prompt. It gives you a pop-up that says, "YOU'RE ABOUT TO EXECUTE AN UPDATE/DELETE QUERY WITHOUT A WHERE CLAUSE. ARE YOU SURE YOU WANT TO DO THIS, BUDDY?" Saves my butt every time.

"It looks like you're trying to ruin your weekend. Would you like help? [Yes] [No]"

 

[Warmart]

This is why I won't work in SSMS without SQL Prompt. It gives you a pop-up that says, "YOU'RE ABOUT TO EXECUTE AN UPDATE/DELETE QUERY WITHOUT A WHERE CLAUSE. ARE YOU SURE YOU WANT TO DO THIS, BUDDY?" Saves my butt every time.

Yeah, would be very nice to have that :'( You'd think MS would've built that in by now but SSMS is super close to being abandoned in favor of Azure Data Studio, yay.

I'm super paranoid about this. I'll always start typing an UPDATE statement as a comment (--), and will actually type the WHERE clause before going to the previous line and typing the SET terms. (Or I'll write the whole thing as a SELECT first, so I can see the result set, before changing it to an UPDATE.)

I do remember one time when a guy called me to his desk in the middle of a really fast paced day, and asked me to debug a lengthy query on his screen. I found the bug, made a quick change, then (pure muscle memory) wacked Ctrl-E to execute the query. I didn't realize that he had a half dozen unrelated queries open in the same window. (Anti-climactic ending: no harm done. But that could have been very bad.)

Paranoia is a must with databases! And yeah, I think everyone has been bitten by F5 or Ctrl-E. I beat that into the head of everyone I work with - do not blindly hit F5/Ctrl-E unless you're damn sure

I'm usually really really careful, feel like I've learned my hard lessons but reminders and constant attention/focus is paramount.

 

[metropolis_4]

Ouch! Why did they keep you???

No idea, I would’ve fired me!